Seeing Souls
by blankdreamer
Summary: One day, the devil with angel's wings fell out of heaven's fruitful tree. Fortunately, and unfortunately he caught her, and she dragged them both down. Emerging from hell, Sakura is scared, and Sasuke wasn't there to listen anymore, "Your soul is lying."
1. the white dress: stained

**Seeing Souls**

_(The White Dress: Stained)_

…

…

_Dear the fucking bundles of crumpled paper I must refer to as "my beloved Diary" or some shit,_

_I am Sakura Haruno, a high school student, a volunteer at the Konoha Leaf Hospital, and regular angsty and bitchy teenager._

_But, people think that I'm a lot more than that. _

_The naive ones think I'm polite. The idiots think I'm smart. The jerk offs say I'm an angel. And the truly _stupid_ people say that I'm pretty. The girlfriends of the naïve ones know I'm a rude bitch. They themselves think I'm naïve. Most people think that I'm a devil with angel's wings. The utterly clueless say that I'm a good person._

_And everyone knows that I was afraid of nothing._

_I have skirted around danger, pranced in its face, and seduced it with my carefree, kiss-my-ass-you'll-never-drag-me-down attitude... _

_But, on that day, it all caught back up with me. Danger swallowed me whole, and refused to let me loose without chewing, and burning me with acidic stomach juices._

_People said that that day was the day that the devil with angel's wings, fell out of heaven's fruitful tree, and into _the_ fiery pit called "Hell."_

_My name is Sakura Haruno, and I feared nothing, until that fateful day, when I stared at fear in the face._

X

I straightened out my favorite white dress. It had small black buttons running down the front that stopped at the bottom of my stomach, and the buttons held down the small ruffles. The dress also had a stiff white bow tied on the left side of my belly, making my waist small. It had a puffy bottom that stopped at the top of my knees.

I smiled in the mirror, doing a girlish twirl, watching the dress fan out below me, and put in my pearl earrings while spinning.

Dizzy.

I stopped and held onto the counter, watching my reflection in the mirror disorient itself. I chuckled at my stupidity, and then blink.

I looked at my mahogany colored table, and pulled out my pearl necklace from a satin box. I stared at it in my palms. It was a gift. And it is my favorite gift I had ever received.

After admiring it for a while, I put it on with some difficulty. I was reaching all the way to the back of my neck, getting my pink locks tangles in the locks, and then ran down the stairs.

My mom was standing at the foot of the stairs, watching me stomp down hastily. Ignoring my mom completely, I pushed through her and strapped on my favorite black sandals with a subtle heel.

When I was done I hopped up and proceeded to the door, my shoes make dull thumps as I walked over towards it. As if on cue, the second I had reached it, the door bell rang.

I opened the door, to see the boy waiting for me. He was standing nonchalantly, looking at me. He smirked and said, "You look nice."

I snorted, flipping my long pink locks over my shoulder. In an annoyed voice I huffed, "I _always_ look nice, Sasuke-kun."

He snickered, pulling my bangs out of my face and then petting my head. He chuckled as I scrunched my nose and swatted his hand away.

Just as I was about to walk out, my mother came out of nowhere, holding my electric blue cardigan. "Sakura! Put on a coat!" my mother called from behind me.

I waved her away, assuring her with a fake smile, though, as soon as I turned around I scowled deeply.

I held onto my Sasuke-kun's warm hand and shook my head, "I'm fine, mom!" I stepped out of my house. I didn't even notice the chill. I closed the door behind me.

The boy looked at me and said, almost fatherly, "You should listen to your mother."

I rolled my eyes and spat, "Whatever, Sasuke."

He squeezed my hand and sighed, "You're so impossible Sakura. It's a wonder how I'm friends with you."

I looked at him, and he averted his gaze. I turned away and made a face. I agreed and said, "A wonder indeed." I huffed, and we were surrounded by silence.

We walked without word to the mall, where we were going to meet up with Naruto and Hinata.

He's Sasuke-kun's and I's best friend.

Or well, he's Sasuke-kun's best male friend, and to me… to me he's a boy that I've liked ever since the first time he's ever he told me I was beautiful (which was roughly two weeks ago, I was wearing that same dress).

And the girl… Well, that's his girlfriend.

She's overprotected and everything. She's small and delicate looking, and she's really beautiful too. She has thick, dark lashes that frame her pale lavender eyes, which are a mystery to me, and she has long purple black hair.

I was very, _very_ jealous.

Not only was she _beautiful_, but she had gotten Naruto.

I had a crush on him, he is one of my dear friends, and he was always nice to me, no matter how snarky I was. But, of course, the heroine doesn't usually end up with her best friend.

I looked to the boy next to me, his face was faced forward, his eyes were ahead and he looked deep in thought.

His blue black hair was cut in a shaggy way; I could almost count the layers, and was sticking up in the back. His lips were pale, and his face was angular and his skin was flawless and gave an eerie white glow.

He was a god.

The girls at school are all over him, throwing themselves, actually and the boys at school were all over him too, asking for autographs or his techniques. They often asked him about how he got so many girls. And they asked to hang out, a pitiful attempt to become a "chick magnet," but Sasuke-kun would always say no.

He'd say no, and tell them that he was going to hang out with me.

He would say that I have better conversation. They would ogle, and remember the times where they tried to talk to me, or should I say, my pretty face. It usually ended up with "the finger" and a couple unintelligent words.

But whatever, Sasuke always listened to what I had to and I think that was my favorite part about him. Once you break down his walls, (easier than you think) he's just a pile of fluff, like cotton candy, melt in your mouth kinda things.

Sweet, and kind, and cute, and naïve.

Yet, really, my real favorite parts about him are his eyes. Those gorgeous jewels that were embedded into his head were his eyes should be. They were always warm and cozy, and just… just so Sasuke. I would look at him, and see myself, I almost feel pretty or beautiful; those meaningless words people spew all the time. In his eyes, I seem like a better person, literally and figuratively.

And that's what he's made of. Those are his ingredients, add a hint of charm and a gallon full of arrogance, and then you've made Sasuke-kun. But don't go trying to concoct a boy like him, trust me, it's not going to work, he's one of a kind.

Suddenly he looked at me, caught me staring. I made no move to turn away. With his sly smirk, he simply said, "I know, I know, I'm gorgeous." In a fashion that he would only do with me, he flipped his bangs to the side.

I stuck my tongue out at him, and puffed out my cheeks, "Don't be so full of yourself, Kid." After sharing some snide comments to each other (that was our thing, making fun and such), we reached the mall. We hustled inside, pushing through people, or mostly him, he was just pulling me along.

We made way to the food court bustling with kids (our age), and moms (with nothing better to do than burn cash), and I heard him swear, "Kids. Why the hell do they always have to hang here?"

I snickered and retorted, "Why do we?" I shrugged.

He replied with his half smile and we sat at our usual table, right in front of the crowds, giving us a full view of the people. I sat next to him, and he casually hung his arm around my shoulders. I leaned on him.

Sasuke-kun chuckled, "Shall we start?"

I nodded and replied, "Start we shall." I straightened up in the seat, even though it was uncomfortable and hurt my ass.

(Honestly, get some better chairs, no one's gonna eat here if they have crappy-ass chairs.)

We scanned the crowd, and I found a particularly easy target. Subtly, I pointed to a girl in our class, long blonde hair, tight, trendy clothes, and a load of shopping bags.

Sasuke-kun looked at me, laughing, "You always choose her, what is left to say?"

I shrugged following her with my eyes. Inside, where Sasuke couldn't see, I was brimming with jealousy. I often was. Maybe that's why my eyes are green.

Ignoring what he said, I pointed out blandly, "Look at all those boys hounding her."

There was literally a pack of boys circling her and she ignored them. One even offered to carry her bags, I thought she was just being mean and brushing them off. Who wouldn't let someone, who offers them, to carry their bags!?

But I guess that's where someone would call _me_ naïve.

"They're trying to get her attention, but she doesn't even spare them a glance," I scanned her form with jealousy one last time, and then Sasuke-kun pointed out someone else.

It was a boy in a parka, in late spring, with dog in his hood. I could just imagine how bad he smelled and how terrible his manners were. He wiped his nose on his sleeves and I blanched.

Disgusting.

Sasuke-kun laughed at me, and looked at the boy with soft eyes (he's not _gay_, that's just his ridiculous thinking face. Or was.). He plays the most thoughtful face when he observes people like that.

He turned to me and said, "He likes dogs, and probably has mutual feelings for his dog. Like, he loves his dog, and his dog loves him. They never leave each other."

I looked at him then with an even more disturbed face. My mouth hung agape a little, and I swatted his arm.

He chortled and smiled (it could light up this whole mall, if he had shown it to someone else), "No, I meant that they were best friends. You know, kinda like us." He tilted his head downward, and looked up at me through his bangs, something he did when he was a little nervous and needed to avert his gaze quickly if he received the wrong answer. In a quiet voice that was just so innocent, and Sasuke, he whispered, "You love me right?"

I smiled and nodded, my long hair shaking with my head, "Only if you love me."

He caught my gaze through his blue black curtains and in a firmer voice, declared, "I do love you, _Sakura_."

What I said next may have been regrettable, "Good, because you're my _best_ friend."

If I hadn't been distracted I would've seen his gaze looked down, and away. He lifted his head up and stared forward at the empty seats before us. I didn't notice any of this; I wasn't paying attention to him at the time. All I saw was Naruto heading towards us, his familiar goofy grin filling his face, and then his tan hand, wrapped securely around pale fingers.

My heart had clenched there, and it took all I had not to frown in disgust.

I mean, Naruto and Hinata? That's too cliché for real life. The popular boy, that is loved by everyone, breathes sunshine, and is as loud as a sonic boom, doesn't end up with the shy girl, a shadow who plays the piano in the background, and is as quiet as a flower dying.

That just isn't right.

(But then, I didn't know that love wasn't supposed to match.)

He pulled up in the seats in front of us, pulling out Hinata's chair, the gentlemen he is, and settled down in front of us. He smiled and nodded at Sasuke, who nodded back and looked at me, "Hello there, Sakura-chan!"

I cherished his smile; I had always thought it was only for me, because the smile he smiled to only Hinata was different.

(Oh, how I wish I knew otherwise.)

I smiled, "Hello, Naruto." I hoped then, that my smile had charmed his as he did me, enough for him to break from Hinata's hands and into my arms.

But I knew things didn't work that way either.

I needed a plan to get that idiot boy to look at me, to pay attention to me, for him to fall into love with me. And finally complete the empty feeling that never ceases to case me.

(I am empty. Empty. Empty.)

We all talked for a bit. Another part or our regular routine, just sitting and talking, watching people and making fun. That's what we did at the mall.

While Hinata and Naruto were engrossed with conversation about something I deemed irrelevant, ramen, seriously?

I looked at Sasuke-kun and he was looking back at me. His arm was casually slung over my shoulders again, and he was holding me close. We watched the kids and moms pass, we made our little witty comments and rallied back and forth about their lives.

Then our eyes fell on a couple kissing. I pointed at them, and Sasuke assessed them quickly.

I spoke, "I can't wait for times like that. Where you can hold one another without fear of rejection, or loneliness. They clearly love each other."

I stared. There was a look in their eyes that I knew could complete my emptiness.

(I am empty. Empty. Empty.)

Sasuke shifted uncomfortably. And quietly agreed, "Yeah." I didn't notice that he looked away from me again, I was elsewhere.

I turned my head to him and ignored the people around us, except Naruto, he was always in my head before. Trying to look calm and collected, I looked at him with half-lidded eyes and partially opened lips, I breathily suggested, "Can we try?"

He face turned a hundred shades of red, my innocent, innocent Sasuke-kun.

(How I wish he were still so.)

I watched as he gulped, I watched as he looked like a kindergartener with a bad case of stage fright. It was cute. In a cool voice he whispered, "If that's what you want…" Uncomfortably, he looked at me.

I smiled and nodded, "First kiss, right?"

He nodded too.

(It was both our firsts. We're 15 and we're not exactly romantically involved with anyone. So, don't expect anything big.)

I leaned up towards, him, he bent down a little.

Our lips touched, and his were soft, and I think mine were rough. My eyes were partially opened, and saw his were fully closed, with a lively mist of red in his cheeks.

(How I wish I saw this sooner.)

I could feel the surprised stares of Hinata and Naruto. I hoped that he would feel jealous and pick a fight. Maybe throw punches at Sasuke-kun, and then sweep me off my feet. But Naruto was loyal to his girlfriend, and when we broke away, he continued to pretend he was talking to Hinata the whole time.

I looked into Sasuke-kun's eyes, and I had seen something different. There was a look, that was familiar and I couldn't pinpoint.

I ignored it then, again.

He was such a bright red, and he retreated his arms back to pull down his shirt over the front of his pants, subtly. I noticed and smirked, winking at him. Flustered, an expression that had seemed to happen with me around, he got up with the excuse, "I have to go to the bathroom."

Hinata got up too, saying the same thing, but I think she meant it. And I was glad. I had Naruto alone. He was looking at me, playing with his fingers. I smiled.

He frowned, "What the hell was that, Sakura?"

My –chan was missing.

I played the innocent card again, "What are you talking about?"

"You kissing, Sasuke. You weren't serious, were you?"

I snapped back to my bitchy self then, and was completely blunt, "No, I wasn't serious."

Naruto sighed, and ran fingers through his hair, then folded his arms and leaned back in the uncomfortable white chairs, "They, why the hell did you do that? You're going to hurt his feelings."

His expression was so serious. But, I didn't pick that up.

"Because I wanted to make you jealous. I love _you_, Naruto."

He opened his eyes, shocked. I swear I saw a flash of disgust in his eyes, and it hurt. He tensed, and I felt my heart squeeze then. The blonde boy shook his head, "Don't shit with me."

I spoke in fragments, repeating what I said, then adding, "Ditch Hinata and come with me."

The look he sent me next slapped me. His eyes burned me, and I felt the loyalty he had, "No." his answer was one-worded but he struck hard enough to go through my thick skull, and into my brain.

But he continued, "Don't be such a bitch, Sakura. I _love_ Hinata, deal with it. And don't play Sasuke like that, imagine the things you make go on in his head!"

I remember thinking that Sasuke was only my friend and I didn't know what Naruto was talking about.

I spat, "What the hell are you talking about?!" My fists were clenched, and I noticed that he was leaning towards me.

Naruto stared into my eyes, a soft kind of blue, "Don't you know? Sasuke like-!" He stopped abruptly, looking past me, and I already knew why.

What was he going to tell me?

(Something so obvious, that I should have noticed then.)

Dammit.

I stood up and Sasuke-kun and Hinata were behind me, walking up. I put on a smile, and so did Naruto, though his eyes were wary. I scratched my head and smiled, "Sasuke-kun, I think I'm going to head home early."

H e nodded, his cheeks still faintly blushed, "Alright, I'll walk you home." He took my hand, quite eagerly, and began to walk.

I didn't move with him. I frowned, finally annoyed to my limit, and I noticed Naruto craned his neck to listen to us talk. He made no move to stop even when I spared him a glance.

"No. I want to walk alone." I returned my stare to Sasuke-kun

Sasuke-kun pathetically stared wistfully at me, and said, "I'll walk you home."

I glared, "_No_. I'm fine. I'm a grown girl; I can take care of myself." I roughly pulled my hand out of his, and stuffed it in the pockets of my dress.

(I noticed my hand felt considerably cold after that.)

I walked out, leaving Sasuke-kun with his mouth open, and a confused Hinata. Naruto watched me leave, perhaps he was grateful. I walked outside, and I felt the brisk, cold on my arms.

_Damn, I really should have brought that cardigan._

It was dark, and the streets were nearly empty. The lights in stores and the dimly lit streets lamps were all I had to guide my way. The moon wasn't helping very much.

I felt alone, and I felt pissed.

_Fucking Naruto. Why not just accept my feelings? Why do you have to be so freaking' loyal to that girl. I've known you longer. I've loved you longer._

_What the hell is wrong with you?_

(All I can think of now is, what the hell is wrong with _me_?)

I didn't notice it then, but I walked straight into an alley. I noticed with I nearly walked into the wall. A dead end. My heart pulsated violently, but I cooled myself down.

I began to walk out when a figure walked around the corner and in a creepy, gruff voice whispered, "Why hello there, my love."

He came into view.

He had a hat messily put on his head, a disgusting badly shaven beard, beady eyes, and worn clothes. I think he only had one shoe on.

He looked like a 40-something year old drunken bastard. I pictured his life as a man with a dead end job, who parties at night to fill the empty space that was his life.

And He looked like the kind who would rape a girl like me.

I definitely wanted to get out of there.

I blanched, "Disgusting. Get out of my way." I tried to turn around him, to the main street.

He put a grimy hand on my shoulder, and I felt ash wipe off on me, "No, no, no!" He put his grubby finger onto my lips, and I threw up in my mouth, "No one gets through with a little lovin'." He pulled out an ominous looking syringe from his coat pocket.

My eyes widened and I gasped. I tried to break free, but he had a strong hold on my shoulder. I couldn't get away. I was too weak and small, and he was at least several times bigger than me.

I squirmed, and then he jumped onto me, straddling me to the ground. Pinning my one shoulder down, he pushed the needed under my skin, and emptied the syringe.

The pain was terrible, he must have pushed it too hard, and he just left it in my arm, pushing down my other shoulder.I let out strangled yelps.

After a few seconds I just felt numb. the effect of whatever drug he had put on me didn't work immediately.

(How I wish it did.)

I remember, he laughed and threw his head back. He looked at me with manic eyes, "Here I come!"

He pushed his chapped lips onto mine. He tasted like beer. He smelled like beer.

I felt tears sting my eyes, and they flew down my face.

I never wanted this to happen.

I didn't really think that karma was real.

But now I'm really regretting things.

The nameless bastard of a man tired to slip his tongue into my mouth. It felt like a slimy, warm slug rubbing my teeth and attempting doggy style of my tongue.

With the bits of insanity I head in my head I bit him.

It bled, into my mouth, and he pulled away, spitting blood on my white dress. He wiped his mouth and winked at me, "Feisty little one, aren't you?"

I spit blood at him.

He frowned, and then took another ominous object out of his coat pocket. It glinted at me, and I swear I almost shit in my dress.

My heart was beating so fast, and I kept screaming and screaming. They began to get muffled as he brought the knife to my neck, and whispered, "Alright, little one, I just want one quick use and then we both be on our merry way, a'ight?"

He pulled up my white dress, and he pulled down his pants, I saw his ugly dick hanging out and I wanted to die so badly.

I remember, I prayed, "Dear god, please save me, I'm sorry if I've done spiteful things and been a total a-hole to everyone… I'll stop. I promise, no, I swear. Just please save me from this horrible man."

He pulled at my underwear, and brought it down to my ankles.

In a last act of defiance, I kicked it in the balls, feeling everything that was there, and I do not want to recall, but it was wet.

He yelped in pain, and the knife slipped, falling, and slicing the side of my neck. He crouched on the floor, holding his crotch.

I sat up quickly, and my head felt heavy. Things were moving when they shouldn't. The drug was taking effect, and I was hyperventilating.

Not even bothering to pull up my panties, I tried to crawl to the exit, my voice was hoarse now, I had nothing to scream.

But that bastard of a man pulled my legs, and I clawed at the dirt off of the alley as a hold. I literally left my claw marks in the ground as he forcefully pulled me back.

Then he propped me up against the, wall and bit my ear, surely it left a mark, "It won't hurt, and it's your first, it won't matter."

It will matter.

My virginity may be all I have. It's my last bit of sanity, it's the only thing a girl really needs to protect. And I desperately didn't want it to be gone just like that, especially not to some random buzzed stranger who drugged me.

But there was nothing could do.

He positioned himself, and the only thing I _could_ do was hold my hands before my private, stubbornly keeping it there even if he just pushes them away. I hoped he'd just give up and stroll away.

He didn't, he reached back for his knife and casually cut the backs of my hands and fingers, I screamed in pain, and pulled them close to my chest, leaving myself exposed and he, in ecstasy, screamed, "Get ready."

It would have gone in.

I would have been deflowered.

But there was a shout, a yell for my name, and never have I ever been so relieved.

"SAKURA!"

The man who suddenly forgot what he was doing and stood up, roughly pulling up his pants, and leaving his belt unhooked. I watched him hide the knife in his sleeve.

I screamed, and the man mercilessly kicked my leg, I fell to the side. Someone called my name again. I was too groggy and out of it to distinguish voices.

I blinked and I saw Sasuke-kun huddled over me, his dark blue eyes searching my body. I didn't understand his tone of voice then, and his words were like water in my ears, I think he said something like, "Sakura, are you alright? Did he hurt you?!" I saw him scowl so deeply I was scared.

_Scared._

The man was behind him, his knife poised and a scream was caught in my throat, and all I managed to choke was, "Behind-!"

Sasuke-kun turned, and I heard his sickening scream, something that should have never been produced. He doubled over his hands to his face, and he let out pained gurgles. The man stabbed him at least three more times, and kicked him.

Sasuke screamed bloody mercy, and all I could do was watch. My body was weal and I kept spacing out. I felt inner turmoil, I had already began to feel guilt.

He stopped beating him, and turned to me. The man had his knife hanging limply in his grubby hands, bloodied, and at the time I had no clue what he had done. My brain was so muddled then, that it was hard to even stay awake.

But, I know so clearly what he said, "See, little girl? If you had just let me use you quickly, this wouldn't have happened! You're little boyfriend would be okay, and he'd probably get laid. But, you had to be a little bitch and deny me. What right do you have?!" There was probably a manic look in his eyes as he raised his knife.

My heart thudded.

The man suddenly fell, an action caused by Sasuke who kicked him in the back of the legs, he fell onto his knife. The stranger let out his own disgruntled scream, and I saw blood pour from his chest.

I blinked.

Sasuke was leaning against my legs, and everything was red. His hands were over his eyes, and I could see… blood.

I lifted my hand, it felt so heavy and put it over his eyes. In a surprisingly calm and collected voice he whispered, "No."

I nodded, and I felt everything move with me. I held his head to my chest and tried my best to stay awake. Sasuke's breathing was shallow, and I had wondered what happened to him.

Red and blue flashing lights came before us, but I didn't feel relieved at all.

X

_I was scared of nothing, I loved taunting danger. But, that day, I, Sakura Haruno, was scared. I had fallen into hell, and the demons were torturing my soul, for all the deeds I done wrong._

_But there was a savior, and I have pulled him down with me._

...

...

**I feel so disgusted. But yeah, how was it? Good? Bad? Awesome? Terrible? I swear things will lighten up soon. Hm, gah, I feel lost. And this is freakin' long (that's what she said). **

**Review! Please.**

**Love,**

**Blankdreamer**


	2. the blue dresss: selfish

**Seeing Souls**

_(The Blue Dress: Selfish)_

…

…

I remember my eyes opening, my senses coming back to me all at once. I had opened my eyes expecting to see that annoying shade of dark pink that was my ceiling, and feeling the weight of my heavy yellow comforter over me…

But I didn't.

I opened my eyes, expecting to see something familiar, something I could relate with, but I didn't.

I was greeted with the sight of a blinding white ceiling, with ugly watermarks. I felt a thin cold sheet over me, and I swear it was paper. I remember scoffing, "Cheap." I brushed them off my arms, and felt something run over my fingers as I did.

I looked down and saw IV's sticking out, and I resisted the urge to pull them out, I knew I was hurt. I blinked and I suddenly heard the sound of a beeping machine next to me, its green glowing on my pale skin.

I looked down and saw that I was wearing my blue dress, it was loose, and was more like a very large shirt. There were different colored buttons, different sizes too, running down from the top to the bottom.

I suddenly got a headache from looking at that bright color. In an attempt to soothe my dizziness, I put a hand to my head, to brush away my hair, and I saw my fingers were bandaged, in alarm I counted them. They were all there, but it stung.

Sighing, I cursed, today was not going to be a very nice day.

I sat up then, my head felt woozy, and my stomach lurched. I grunted softly, and twitched, my neck hurt. Using a finger that wasn't bandaged, I touched it, I had another wrapping around my neck.

I was really lost at that point, nothing was making sense to me, and all I knew was that I was somehow hurt, and confined in the hospital. I remembered being annoyed.

I tried to clear my mind of such trivial things and thought of the possible situations. I shut my eyes for a while, and when I opened them, I was met with no epiphany, hell, I might have ended up even more lost than before.

I blinked again, and I heard another noise. It was another annoying beeping from next to me.

Warily, I turned my head, and I saw another white hospital bed with paper sheets. I saw a pale boy, tall, almost too tall for the cot, with messy dark hair. He had gauge wrapped around his eyes, and his lips were pulled into a scowl. I felt a sense of familiarity with him.

I couldn't recognize _him_ at first.

I just couldn't put my finger on it, my brain didn't let me search that far. I huffed, and shook my head. It didn't help, it possibly muddled my mind a bit more. I put a hand to my head, messed up my pink locks.

Suddenly, like a slap to my face, I remembered.

I thought of that bastard man in the alley, the attempted rape, the heroic boy…

"Sasuke!"

I turned to him again, looking at his hand that was let out of the blanket, it remained still. I desperately wanted to be by him, to see what was wrong, to hear what happened, because I still couldn't believe it.

I looked around for any sign that I was alright, I turned my head to the table by the bed, and saw a clipboard, it was familiar and I knew you wrote everything about a patient on it. I grabbed it, one of my arms completely numb, and I took it to myself.

On the top was a little post-it that said in an annoying bubbly scrawl, _Sakura Haruno._ I took that part off and crumpled it. The page under it was less satisfying, I read over it quickly.

It was about putting me into some therapy, _Rescue Me,_ or some shit like that. I honestly didn't care. I read the questions and immediately deemed it as worthless crap, I ripped it off and flung the paper away.

There were only couple sheets left, and the next page was the one that I needed. I read it, and I gasped, I lied. I completely did not want to read it, or hear it, or even think of it again.

_Sakura Haruno, age 15, female._

_Police found her in alley, covered in blood holding _the_ boy in her arms. We believe she was there on attempted rape by the man found dead in the alley, he had be drunk, and stabbed with a knife. Cause for his death is still unknown._

_She received a drug through her arm, slit neck, bruised leg, and slashed fingers. There seemed to be no penetration from the attempted rape, and the patient experienced some trauma._

_She will be in stable condition soon. Need to run through with the psychiatrist first, before departure._

I took that as an okay that I could at least get up off the bed. I pulled the IV's out of my arms, haphazardly flinging them back at the machine. I pushed herself off the bed, and my stomach lurched again. I held her head, and clutched my belly.

I had eased myself onto the floor, the cold tiles sending a chill up to my spine. I pushed myself up, my bruised leg throbbing a little, and my head kept twirling. I limped to Sasuke's bedside, and I kind of fell atop of it.

I pushed myself up again, and I sat on the edge next to him, sitting with my legs pulled up underneath me. Without thinking I grabbed his hand.

They were cold, they were like blocks of ice. I never felt them like that before; they were always so warm when we had held hands. I sandwiched his hands with mine, I whispered his name.

He didn't move at all.

I heart pounded, as the thought "is he dead?" resounded through my mind. I shook my head, pushing the unneeded thoughts back.

I called his name again.

I was on the brink of tears, my friend, my _only_ friend was in the hospital cot next to me, not moving, I was so worried I felt bile rise in my throat. I was suddenly overwhelmed with the thoughts that this was my entire fault. The guilt had caught up to me.

I leaned down and put my head to his hands, and the waterworks started. I started to do the "ugly cry." It is the cry where you have snot running down your nose, tears flowing uncontrollably and where you're spewing nonsense that no one can understand what you're saying – not even yourself.

"I'm sorry, Sasuke, this is all my fault, all… my… fault!"

I remember his voice. It was so deep and gruff, like he was a man, not the little gullible boy I had always thought he was. In a flat tone, that was leaning more towards pissed than tired, he had mumbled, "Not your fault."

My head jolted up then, from his hand, my face was flushed from the scalding hot tears and the snot, "Sasuke! Are you alright?! I'm so sorry!" I went back to crying then, but my cry was a little more refined, just tears and a lot of sniffling.

With his other hand, he rested his hand on my thigh, after a couple pats and gropes along the bed. He gave my leg a small squeeze of reassurance, "I'm fine, the bastard just gave me a couple bruises."

Through teary eyes and a mouthful of phlegm I managed to shriek, unattractively, "Idiot! You're hurt!" I looked at the bandages over his eyes, imagining what his warm and cozy dark eyes looked like. I assumed they were sad.

"I'm fine."

His answer was so blunt that I was worried. My heart was pounding in my chest, _is he mad at me?_ I thought all those stupid possibilities, answer myself with the harshest comments, _of course, bitch, he risked himself for you._

"I'm not mad at you."

"You're not?"

"I'm not."

"… Why not…?"

"Do you want me to be mad at you?"

"No! But, you don't feel any resentment? Any hate?"

"Nothing, except that I want to personally maim that bastard who touched you."

I quieted. Sasuke was never a vengeful person. He was usually pure, he didn't like to hurt people, of course he'd make a couple snide comments and toss around a couple bad names, but he never wanted to physically harm anybody. I felt very uncomfortable then.

"What?" he asked, turning his head to me. I felt a little scared, it was like he was a monster, looking at my form through layers of gauze, his lips lined into an unpleasant scowl, "Why are you hesitating?"

I stuttered, something so rare for a usually brash person like me, "Are you okay?"

"How many times to I have to say it, Sakura, I'm fine," his tone of voice was like squeezing lemons into an old wound, it stung like whiplash. When had he become so bitter?

My crying quieted, and I was only sniffling then. I wiped my face with my hands and just sat there letting myself stare at him. It seemed like he was staring at me too through those bandages, but I never thought that.

The silence dragged on, I made no attempt to break it, and neither did he. Tears kept blocking my vision, and I remember his face blurring and I saw his old comforting face, his dark cozy eyes, his lips pulled into his small smile… but every time I wiped them away, I saw bits of reality, the bandages, the scowl…

"I'm sorry…" I whispered, it was like releasing a breath, I didn't expect him to reply, I hadn't even expected him to hear, much less answer.

"For what?"

I winced at his sharp tongue and straight forward answer. I put a hand on his chest, he was still lying down, and fisted my hand on his shirt for a second before answering, "I'm sorry I made you hurt like this, not matter how find you say you are, I know you're not. You're not acting like it. I'm sorry for making you stand up and protect me like that."

I saw him bite his lip, and I wondered if he knew I was looking at him again. I kept seeing his eyes. His hand fell from my leg, and he rested both of them atop my hand on my chest.

His hands were cold as he said, "So… you're sorry that I loved you enough to do that?" I didn't feel his heart beat. I didn't hear a tinge of sadness in his voice. And I couldn't look into his eyes to figure anything out.

I whimpered out that pathetic word, "Love?"

His hands grew colder if that was possible, and his body stilled more than it had before, "Yes."

I couldn't bear to say anything. I didn't want to say anything wrong at a time like this, which was a mistake. I should have asked something to clarify, I shouldn't have been so selfish to think of only myself, of only my discomfort. I remained silent.

In a small voice, that reminded me of his old self, timid almost, he softly spoke, "I love you, Sakura." The way his voice rolled over my name, and those sacred words my body shivered. My palms were sweating, and his fingers twitched. In a whisper he continued, "Do you love me?"

I froze. The question that he posed to me the day of the accident was exactly the same, but I had misread the contents. I remember thinking that maybe this was why he was mad, because he _loved_ me.

But, before I told him that I loved him, as a friend… I couldn't think of holding him like a lover than a brother. I couldn't image holding his hand out of pure intimacy, instead of as… whatever it was.

Cold sweat broke on my forehead, and I bit my lip, faintly I tasted beer and blanched. Swallowing the foul flavor, I quietly replied, "I do… I do love you."

I thought I saw his mouth twitch, and somewhere in my heart I jumped for joy because I thought he was going to break into that familiar grin, but he didn't. He scowled again, and it was so ugly, it was so heart breaking.

In a voice that sounded scratchy and accusing he hissed, "You liar."

I was so confused at that point. I didn't know why he suddenly spewed that, why his hands were drawn back, throwing back my own, or why he was pushing himself up. I didn't know why he was suddenly reaching for the bandages.

I walked to him on my knees, fumbling to keep his hands away from the gauge, I said, "Don't! You're know supposed to!"

He pushed me back mercilessly, forgetting I was a girl, that I was fragile, that I was his friend, someone who's advice he _should_ take. But he forgot, I assume. I fell to the other side of hte cot, by his feet. I sat there watching him, knowing his strength, and that everything at this point was inevitable. There was no stopping.

Because soon the bandages were being wound around his hand instead of over his eyes, and I found myself scared. I was scared to see what was under it, I was scared to face his cozy black eyes, perhaps not so cozy anymore, but I was scared. Though, what scared me the most was how selfish I was. There I was, sputtering in my mind about the intense fear I was feeling, when Sasuke should be the one harboring all those emotions, he should be the one heavily affected.

He hurled the pile of bandages to the floor, the floated and barely made any sound as it collapsed to the ground.

I looked at him, but his hair was covering his eyes, but I saw his shoulders heaving up and down, and heard labored breaths. The voice that came next gave me nightmares, it was dark and hollow, "_Do you love me, Sakura?_"

I swallowed, crawling back to him, trying to be a good friend back to him, at least once and whispered, "I do, I do."

"You're lying…"

"I'm not, how would you know?"

"You're lying…"

"Sasuke…?"

"…"

"Hey…?"

"You're lying, you're soul is lying."

I fought back an urge to scream. I just imagined that if I had, it would shatter the glass vase holding flowers by the bed, and it would ring in both our ears while he slept. The scream would have been followed by another chorus of the ugly cry. But I didn't. I held everything in, only letting a small gasp escape my parted lips.

His shoulder twitched at the noise, and then he looked up at me, and his eyebrows furrowed, knitted together, his lips in the unpleasant frown, and his eyes… _his eyes…_

They weren't the homely black, the one that I could always seek solace in. They were red, like a violent spew of blood. They pierced through me, like while I looked at them I felt like they were squeezing the air out of me.

I looked away. I really shouldn't have, I would have seen the look of betrayal, hurt that erupted on his face, but I did. I killed whatever hope our friendship had left with that simple turn of the head.

"What are you talking about…?"

Sasuke put a hand up to his eyes, holding his hand over it and looking down, I took that time to look back at him. He whispered, "I… you're soul. I see it."

_What?_

"It's confused right now. But before… before, you're soul was just lying. I could see it. I could see what you were thinking by the colors of… aura. I see it. Liar. Just friends…?"

His words were just jumbled and he just kept trailing off. I never really understood what that meant. I was still lost, but I was still rude, "What happened to your eyes?"

Said eyes flickered up at me, the red choking me, but he looked away quickly, and I inhaled nosily. He whispered, "That man… he cut my eyes… I was going to be blind, but some… some person donated their eyes to me… Now… I can see people's souls… auras."

"Why are they red?"

"I don't know," His eyes hardened and it looked like he was questioning himself about talking to me. I suspected he felt me think that because he looked at me again, "Sakura…"

I looked at him back then. My heart thudding, "Yes?"

"I don't ever want to see you again."

I choked, "Pardon?"

"Get out of my sight."

I blinked opening my mouth, but he beat me, explaining quickly, "You toyed with me. You didn't _care_ about me. Go away. You piss me off." With that he turned, and never answered any of my other unanswered questions. He sat there still, looking out through the window, it was raining, pouring heavily. For a while the sound of rain pounded on the glass filled the conversation.

But I was so mad about what he said, him banishing me, I was so mad at him. There was just anger seething out of my body. But not all of it was channeled to him, some to me too, because in a strange turn of irony, he described me perfectly. I did toy with him. I don't care about that way, I always thought we were just friends, that it was never going to bloom into anything else. I didn't know that there were any chemistry, or hell, even sparks of love.

I pulled myself off the bed, accidentally pulling his leg off the bed when my arm moved. It moved stiffly. I ran across after shrieking, "_FINE!_ Then I never want to see you ever again either, Uchiha!"

As I past my cot I noticed a crappy plastic white chair, and on it was a white dress. My _favorite_ white dress, but it was stained with flecks of brilliant blood. I felt tears in my eyes. I kicked the chair down, and then outside, the door having been open a few inches.

I pushed through crowds of doctors, ran across the patient room that I had worked in many time and outside. The double doors opened for me, having been automatic, but they didn't open fast enough because I slammed my right shoulder and hip on the opening door in my haste.

I didn't care though.

I looked up into the sky, and rain shot into my face. It hurt, like tiny pieces of glass piercing into my skin, each one with a different area to arouse pain. I hugged my shoulders and broke down onto the ground, the cement pressing into my porcelain skin.

I wondered if Sasuke could see me from the room, and if he were looking at me. I imagined him sitting, staring at me, with cozy black eyes getting ready to run out and embrace me. But those weren't his eyes anymore. He probably didn't see me, and if he did... He wouldn't do anything.

I didn't care though.

I started _the_ ugly cry, having it start with the howling of my throat. I stayed like this before some nurses had the sense to come outside and get me. They looked at me, yelling about shit I didn't care about. They literally dragged my ass back inside, I felt my skin cut raw a little.

They put me back in the room with _him_, telling me to stay put, they even had the nerve to put up the chair I kicked down, muttering, "It'll be gone with a couple washes of bleach."

As soon as they left I leapt up from my spot and kicked the chair back down, there was silence in the hallway, and I took the dress, hurling it into the silence, then retreated back to the paper made cot.

My nose twitched, and the water works ran again. I didn't know why I was even crying anymore. I didn't know what I was feeling. Everything was just there.

I started the cry again, and I felt Sasuke's violent stare cut through me, squeezing whatever tears I had left out of me. He was probably listening into my thoughts, hearing me swear about nothing, listening to the screams in my head. Now, I wonder what he felt.

But back then, I didn't care.

…

…

**Oh gosh. Why am I always so bad at updating? Like, I really have nothing to do in the day, but I never get to this! Sigh. One day, one day I will be a better updater. (Pfft, like that'll ever happen.)**

**Anywho, thanks for the reviews in the previous chappies! (And thanks for the reviews in RMT!) Review again, please? Thanks.**

**Hm, For some reason, Sakura is such a bitch. Do you guys have any reasons as to why, to contribute? I want to make her really complicated, so she seems more… realistic, I guess.**

**Lovelovelove,**

**Blankdreamer**


	3. the pink dress: comfort

Seeing Souls

_(The pink dress: Comfort)_

…

…

We sat in the same room for the rest of the day. Nurses bustled in and out, and I saw that they would silently swoon over Sasuke until he lifted his head up and looked them in the eye, they'd run away then, screaming bloody murder, and, without hiding it, stare.

But no matter what, his expression was always annoyed. (An expression I had rarely saw.) And I sort of pitied him at that point. All these people were huddling around him, whispering about him, starting rumors without even knowing so much as his name.

I frowned, his eyes flickered towards me and I turned away.

I heard him mutter, "Get the hell away from me." Maybe he was like that because he could read their cliché and dirty thoughts. Maybe he couldn't block them out. Maybe he heard me, and wanted me to stop thinking.

I tried my best not to think about him or the situation. I tried to focus on something in the room, like my dress that laid on the floor. The nurses hadn't bothered to pick it up, seeing that I kicked the chair down twice.

It lay on the floor like a puddle of beautiful white with deep red flecks on it. My eyes hardened for a fraction of a second, contemplating about getting up and stomping it into the white tiles. I blinked and dismissed the thought as soon as it formed words in my head.

Then I just sat there.

I can imagine the facial expression I had; cool and composed was replaced with an pissed beyond relief look, with my lips twitching into a frown every time something moved. I was so touchy, I didn't respond to what the nurses were asking of me.

I felt like I was acting more of a baby than Sasuke, he was just there silently doing what they want him to do before they actually voiced it out to him, just in an annoyed fashion, but regardless, he didn't put up a fight..

I looked at him one time, the doctor had a small flashlight on Sasuke's eyes, checking to make sure everything was alright. I saw his eyes in the intensified light, brilliant in red and I couldn't help but think, _can he really see these things? Of course not. Why am I so gullible?_

His eye flickered onto me when I thought that, glaring at me and I just blinked. I remember thinking, _oh, he just wants the attention. He just wants to push me away with all that shitty talk._

I felt his steely eyes on the side of my face, but I didn't move towards him. I didn't even breathe. I sat there with my hands balled up in fists on the paper sheets, glaring forward at a perky news reporter on the TV.

She had shiny blonde hair, short and in a volumized bob around her. I snickered thinking of all the hairspray and wax she must have put into that. I looked at her clothes, her shirt was low enough to show ample cleavage and I rolled my eyes annoyed. She played an over enthusiastic smile, that made it looked like she'd be in pain if she stopped.

I moved my eyes away from the television and a peculiar looking man came in, he had black hair and odd shaped eyes. He just put up the chair I kicked down, oh the nerve of that guy, and just started asking me stupid questions.

"So, how did you get into the alley?" He positioned his pencil over his clipboard, readily, studiously.

"I was just spacing out, and then he was behind me," I shrugged, that was what happened.

"Did you try to fight back?" His eyes looked deeply into me, and I swore he started to lean closer with intensity, I merely frowned.

"What the hell do you think? I tried. I tried to get him to stop, but he didn't. He was, like, buzzed."

"What did you do?" He looked down at his paper, and I peered over to see the messy doctor scrawl. I couldn't even make out the words.

"Well, I kicked him in the balls and bit him, if that counts for anything," I sighed that part out.

"I see."

"Yeah."

"Are you feeling anything unusual?"

"Nothing but the awkward atmosphere."

His weird eyes glanced up at Sasuke then back at me. He scribbled notes on his clipboard in the illegible doctor script, and left, coming back every half hour with new questions.

The rest of the day at the hospital, at least for me, went like that. I sat there, until a lady with big breasts, my principal, my mentor, came inside, her hazel eyes pissed (and dilated).

She pulled me out of the hospital, away from Sasuke's glaring form, and brought me to her car. She motioned me to go inside and I had. We sat inside, I buckled my seat belt and she left her undone. I raised a brow.

Tsunade-shishou looked at me, and hissed, "What the hell happened to you?"

I looked at the frown on her ruby red lips, and the wrinkles on her forehead, then down and away, "I… a man attempted to rape me in an alley… Sas-…. he saved me." I couldn't say his name, and I still can't.

She frowned, but started driving and spoke, "How could you do something so stupid?" I saw her hands tighten around the wheel, I think I imagined it cracking in half.

"I didn't do it on purpose."

She looked at me with her hazel eyes through the mirror, but I looked away, watching the cars outside, cheering on the raindrops trailing down the window. In a soft voice that she hardly ever uses she quietly asked, "Are you okay?"

"Just _dandy._"

The car came to a sudden halt. I whipped my head toward the front, and saw that we were in front of a red light, but the force of the stop was a bit exaggerated. I looked at Tsuande-shishou.

She was already looking at me. Her lips were pulled into a scowl, and I wondered, would anyone smile at me today? But no one did. She hissed, "How can you be so nonchalant? Don't treat this like it was no big deal, Sakura." There was an authoritative tinge in her voice, and a hint of hurt, like it had happened to her, but it didn't. There was also some warning there.

Her tone scared me, for once, feeling the severity of the words. The thing was that I wasn't really disturbed by the attempted rape, sure it was traumatizing, but soon it'll be over and done with. I was more disturbed of the damage it had done on Sasuke, whatever the damage was.

I looked down at my bandaged fingers, trying to wait her out. She didn't ask me anymore questions, she just drove me home, where the second the door opened my mother and father embraced me tightly.

My mom was wailing and wailing, and my father was thanking Tsunade-shishou, probably unconsciously attracted to her large… assets, he came to me though, patting my head like I fell and got hurt.

The nonchalant act on his part bothered me. Maybe this was what she was talking about. That that was why she was bothered by me acting cool about it, but the truth was I really didn't care about that. It happened and I'm safe. What's the big deal anymore?

They started at me for a while, expecting me to break into tears over this, but I wasn't really bothered by it. Sure I was bothered at the time, but nothing essentially happened to me. Just a couple of cuts and bruises, and maybe the slight fear of alleyways, but I was fine overall. But not everyone was.

My mom broke back into hysterics, and Tsunade-shishou helped my mom hobble to the couch and my dad fetched them some refreshments.

They left me standing in the front hall, alone. And I couldn't help but mutter a curse. I was being selfish again, thinking, _what the hell. I was just nearly raped, and though I'm unaffected, they just leave me here, and comfort my mother. What the hell._

I brushed it off, and treating everything as if it were a normal day, I walked upstairs into my room. I locked the door behind me, turned on the radio where they were playing music without those annoying commercials.

I stripped off my dress, remaining in only a bra and underwear, and laid in my mess of blankets on my bed.

Leaving the radio on low, I shut my eyes, and ushered sleep to overcome me. It did after a while, but the wait was torture. I heard my parents and Tsunade-shishou talk in hushed tones, they were discussing my freedom.

"… shouldn't be left alone…"

"… someone guard her…"

"… pressures at school… no friends…. Sasuke…"

I covered my ears and then fell asleep shortly after that, and in my dreams, I dreamt of those cozy black eyes burst into violent red orbs.

They haunted me, along with the words, "I don't ever want to see you again."

And for the first time in a long time, I didn't want to wake up.

X

Sleep past by all too quickly. I woke up, staring at my obnoxious pink ceiling, feeling the weight of my colorful comforters. I reached my hand out of my warm burrow to hit off the alarm clock. I also groped along my nightstand to turn on the light.

It was dim, but I could see my bandaged hand, and I suddenly felt my aching bruises. I wince, and sit up. The blankets fall off around me, leaving my exposed in my cold room. I blink a couple times, and then get up.

I looked down to see that I was barely wearing anything, but shrug off whatever I had to take a shower. The second I turned the knob, I stepped in despite the cold water.

I shivered under it, but I silently waited for it to reach a blazing warm. It did so in a few seconds, and I stood there, taking my bandages off. They fell onto the wet shower floor with gross splashing noises.

The water between my feet turned red from the blood bleeding out of my cut fingers. I ignored it, watched it swirl into the drain. The water pelted my back like the rain had yesterday, only warmer, scalding.

Red eyes flashed in my mind. I shuddered violently and hit the wall of my shower. I slid down it and curled up in fetal position against it. My lip was trembling.

I felt like I couldn't breathe. I felt like I needed a nice good cry, but I couldn't start it, I didn't have the energy. I sighed and shut my eyes.

I tried to let the water soothe me and relax my tense body, but it kept pelting my cuts and my ears. It hurt,

I started to hallucinate that with each drop of blazing water was an accusing stare of everyone at school. They would blame me for hurting… him. I opened my eyes and looked down.

The swirling red blood was gone. The traces removed, I looked at the drain with half-lidded eyes and hoped that school would be fine.

Of course, the world hates me and nothing seems to go my way.

X

My parents dropped me off at school, both of them, which is totally unusual considering they both work an hour away. They kept stealing glances at me through the mirror. I had tried to ignore them to the best of my ability, because the words reflected in their eyes were _shame, hate, stupidity_ and _irresponsible_.

I caught my mothers stare once, and she, in a superficial this-is-what-I'm-_supposed_-to-sound-like voice, she sang, "Honey, are you gonna be okay?"

I wanted to snap back, "I dunno, are you?" but I never said anything, I just grunted and she turned away, to look outside the window.

The second they pulled up at my school, I flung myself out of the car. I don't think I even bothered to close the door. I stumbled up the cement steps of my school, my leg throbbing, and hauled open the large glass entry doors.

I swear the hallways shut up in silence when the door slammed behind me. I played a cheesy smile and waved, "Hey!" I walked through, the crowd seemingly opening up to me. I entertained the idea of me be Moses and parted the red sea.

I blinked and I saw red eyes. The arrogance and false confidence I had only moments ago were washed away and brought back with fear. I stared at my feet, and then I began to hear the whispers.

"I heard she got raped."

"Who the hell cares? She probably has had sex since she was 10."

"How vulgar."

"How disgusting."

"What a slut."

"What a whore."

"What a bitch."

"She went so far to get Sasuke-kun involved."

"He's the real victim here."

"Yeah, have you seen his eyes?"

"I know, they scare the hell out of me too."

"She ruined his reputation."

"Bitch."

"Bitch."

"_Bitch."_

"_bitch."_

I felt my body quake. Tears blurred my vision, but I vowed not to let them fall in school. I bit my lip and whipped my head around to the source of the whispers. My peircign green eyes probably stabbed them all in the heart.

I hissed, almost horror movie like, dripping in vengeance and hate, "_Will you guys just shut the hell up?"_

They didn't. They're chatter probably increased.

I felt such a horrible rage in the pit of my stomach. I let out a scream, just out of stress. I took off my bag in a motion that probably bruised my arms and hurled it at a classroom door. I heard their screams. Overdramatic, unnecessary screams. I yelled again, "SHUT THE HELL UP!"

They only stared.

They all fucking stared.

My chest was heaving, and my head was swirling.

Why had I gotten so mad? Why is there all this rage when I was so indifferent before? When did I get so damn emotional?

I felt people step closer. Their faces all looked the same, superficial and forced. I felt like I heard chants, "Now, now, Sakura… it's alright. It's alright."

I saw a teacher come closer, multiple teachers, male teachers. And I felt my breath catch in my throat. I fell onto the floor, crumpling onto my side staring in front of me, looking at my vigorously twitching hands.

I don't know what just happened. I don't know what I'm feeling. But all I know is that I want something. I want something I probably ruined.

I want those cozy black eyes, the warm smile, and unwavering attention. My heart clenched as I thought of what he would do.

He would pick me up my the shoulders and rest in my his chest. He'd stroke my hair and call me pretty, beautiful, perfect. He rub my back and just hold me tight.

(Was that love?)

But he wasn't. He wouldn't. those times were long from over. He would never be here and I would never be there.

I felt myself slink back into reality and I saw his shoes. I knew all of his shoes, dirty, red converses with a heart on the side. A heart from me. I followed up his leg, his torso and onto his face.

He looked at me, void of anything I could make out of it, and held my glance for a second. Tears pooled and I felt them teetering at the edge of my lids. I even let out a satisfying whine.

He quickly turned his heel and exited the crowd. The disappearing sound of his shoes was all I could hear until they were gone.

I blinked and there were people hovering over me. But I didn't care, a vow I had made so easily was going to be broken. I was going to cry my ugly cry and ruin my tough-as-nails image.

And just when I felt a hot tear roll down my flushed cheeks, a tan hand covered my face. I was lifted off the floor and carried away. I wondered if my weight was a problem, but I ended up hissing, "What the hell?"

A reassuring voice I thought I had broken from called, "Sakura-chan, could you shut up for just a minute? I'm helping you out here!" I knew his playful tone and I even dared to think of a smile in my head.

I heard another voice. A voice I was so jealous of, "Yeah, we just saved you, girl."

I gritted my teeth, and I seethed, "Great, just great."

…

…

**WOOOO! Update! Wow, I feel like this chapter was kind of just a mush of words, but that's how you feel when you're frustrated right? Well yeah, sorry for taking forever. I'm a busy person. (HAH! What a lie.)**

**Review please, thaaaaank you for the reviews in the previous chapters as well.**

**Love,**

**Blankdreamer**


End file.
